In some organisations, there is a team known as “Internal Affairs” or something similar. They are brought in if there is suspicion of wrongdoing. They investigate what has happened, if it is an ongoing problem, and if there is a need to investigate further or bring allegations against the individuals involved. The internal affairs team has a very tough job. They walk into departments that they know very little about and ask hard questions of people who likely have reason to hide things from them. They are the most hated team in the organisation because they come in and question what may have been accepted in the culture for a long time.
As individuals, when we are looking to make a change, it is helpful to run this internal investigation on ourselves. Just like the departments may be resistant to this investigation, evaluating our innermost feelings, and assessing the way we are living our lives can create internal resistance. It is a really difficult process for us to do, which is why a large proportion of humans do not do it. Unfortunately, if we do not perform an internal investigation, the issues will continue to fester until it is a much bigger issue that we need to deal with.
In my experience, the Universe, God, Yoda, or whoever you believe is the high power guiding your life, sends us signs that we can use as guideposts to direct our journey. In his book, Greenlights, Matthew McConaughey articulates this very well. If you are on the right road, you keep getting greenlights that propel you forward but if you make a detour, that is not aligned with the universe’s intention for you, you may encounter some amber and red lights, encouraging you to rethink the road that you are on.
When we have asked the hard questions of ourselves, thought about what we are really looking for in our life, and determined what needs to happen for us to get there, we are more open to noticing the lights and determining where they are guiding us. Doing the internal investigation may cause us to realise that we have a pattern of behaviour, which is repeating itself and causing us to stray further from our desired path.
To start the internal investigation, you may like to ask these questions.
What do you want to achieve?
Why do you want to achieve it?
What will it feel like?
What is holding you back?
What do you need to do to make a change?
What are you scared of?
Are you repeating the same behaviours and having the same problems?
Whose opinion are you worried about?
Journaling and meditating on these questions are a good foundation for your internal investigation. Once the investigation is complete, you will be able to use what you have learned to craft a roadmap to get you closer to what you desire, to get your career back on track, and work towards that which will give you greater fulfilment in your life.