Managers often brag that their door is always open but in my experience, there are very few managers who actually live by this premise. In many cases, they do not have the time or do not make the time to really listen to the concerns of their people. We know that to have a culture of continuous improvement, we need to have employees who are comfortable addressing aspects of their work that can be improved. However, unless we have managers who are actively working on being approachable, this may not happen. With the shift to remote working, this is becoming more of an issue as employees may need to go out of their way to have time with their boss in order to raise the concerns.
Sam Goldwyn, a Hollywood movie director, was famously quoted, “I don’t want any yes men around me, I want everyone to speak up even if it costs them their job.” Unfortunately, it may well be that employees risk their job by speaking up and advising areas of improvement. This is often due to a lack of self-awareness in the management team. When executives spruik that they want employees to speak up, question and offer suggestions, they may not realise that the middle managers below them do not have the skill to handle the constructive feedback or the self-awareness to accept feedback that they may not agree with. It is important that employees feel comfortable to bring forward ideas, but the approachability of managers goes a long way to ensuring that this happens. Meghan Reitz, co-author of “Speak-Up”, stresses that, “We simply do not realise how risky it can feel for others to speak up”.
If a leader is a direct communicator, someone who is driven to get things done, rather than people-orientated, the outcome may be being seen as unapproachable to those around them. The irony is that they think that they are approachable as they have either not been given the feedback that they are “scary” or dismissed said feedback without doing the self-reflection to determine if there is any truth in it. The key to developing self-awareness is asking the question of those around you in an open and transparent way. This will only bring insight if you are willing to accept what they tell you. Tasha Eurich, Organisational Psychologist, Researcher and Author of “Insight – The Power of Self Awareness in a Self-Deluded World”, conducted research in conjunction with the Harvard Business Review, which found that 95% of people think that they are self-aware but only 10-15% actually are. This statistic is horrifying when you think about it but was not a great surprise to me given my experience with the corporate world.
The key takeaway is that most of us need to make a concerted effort to be approachable. If we are seen as unapproachable, working on our self-awareness will improve this. The perception of approachability will generally decrease with the level of stress that we are experiencing as most people revert to a more directive communication style when under pressure. Smile more, ensure that you have time for people when you have meetings booked in, be present and listen to your team’s concerns, it is where the gold for continuous improvement lies. Walk the talk, your door doesn’t have to always be open but when it is, welcome people, listen and seek clarity. Take the time to consider how you can be more available to people when working remotely, a drop-in hour twice a week might work but often scheduling one-on-one and team meetings and regarding these meetings as non-negotiable can be enough. Feedback is an opportunity to improve but only if we have the courage to self-reflect and try to increase our emotional intelligence. It is not easy, but it is worth making the effort as self-awareness is essential for good leader to become great whether you are leading yourself your team, your household, or your organisation.